02 11 2026

 Did a drawing in Collioure, cant find it now but its in this house somewhere. Its been so long that Ive looked at something and watched the point of a pencil re-iterating it. Felt like this when I was a child; the magic and fear of the magic palpitating. 

Now home, one of them, the least uncomfortable - no heat, no hot water and currently no electricity - but its clear that this might end soon, maybe this week ? And I have a new phone which some sweetie managed to equip with the old number. Cant install anything or make it work but tomorrow will harass  Ronan, Esperazas computer geezer.

The London house has had the exclusion order lifted and we are legally allowed to enter. No gas yet, not sure about electricity -  planning on going there in a couple of weeks -

And the builders here claim to have finished knocking things about so dust can - maybe - settle. Not just clouding the house, studio, study, bedrooms,  but also garden, terrace of no 11 and the bedroom there. Will need seven maids with seven mops. 

Reminding myself how the renaissance artists loved and cultivated melancholy.  

31 10 2026

 Couple of days holiday, yeah, two buses to Collioure and the sweetest hotel in Christendom. Life has been difficult. 

Within minutes of arriving, before arrival at sweetest hotel in C., my phone was stolen. Everything, everything - including the holiday cash.

No chance of return, the kids will have taken the money and junked the phone; so said the graceless town police who clearly thought it served me right. 

Mercifully the hotel knew I was coming and  let us in and equally mercifully Bob still has his phone and therefore access to dosh. Not a relaxing and joyful hols though.

Bought a new one today. I have to cancel my number and get it reinstated but this is turning into another bunch of fuckwittery. Accepting that my memorable and amusing phone number is joining all this years losses  ... I guess there's still masses to loose. Will be re reading Job soon. 

22 10 2026

 Can't use studio, certainly cant use study - writing this in dining room which is also so dusty its crunchy in my mouth.

Have jumped houses and am sleeping in no 11, which is much much better.... though now aware of how dilapidated it is. Endless entropy. 

Study will be impressive I think...

15 10 2026

 I've accepted the impossibility of doing anything, which is most liberating. Finding the cryptic notes I've left myself is worrying; plus supercharged on coffee as I escape my harrowing house.

11 10 2026

This is where everything we have - what there is, having lost lodger income - should be going. Bar coat.

 https://www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/woodland-terrace-emergency-fund?utm_campaign=sharemodal&fbclid=IwY2xjawU3_0ZleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBwZG9mBXNydGMGYXBwX2lkEDIyMjAzOTE3ODgyMDA4OTIAAR5LTX7wnHc1rZsoPtYWTTkQLWA2ZKr4EFV4FFV2bbnCWauK3xa8CLg6WxUQqQ_aem_QAhV4TJSsZceAg2ZQHJBbQ

08 10 2026

 Maybe one rat left... unwilling to start cleaning until I'm sure they're all rotting under the floorboards, yes indeedie - there are horrid smells everywhere.

My sense of powerlessness is beginning to turn on me. Yesterday I bought a new coat - first hand - at vast expense, something I've not done for 25 years plus. In shock after the event; sussed that its about control, taking it where I can.

Today is allocated for the knocking-down of the pediments in the London house. The fundraiser in the church opposite has paid off the groups' surveyor, hurrah, but the council are going to charge us for repairs we don't want, don't need nor are insured for. They are in the region of 10K per household. Only plus is that the council (RBG) will attach the debt to the deeds and not charge us interest

No rent coming in, of course - tenant also forced out.

The council claim that after they've knocked down the groups pediments, so making the houses safe, we can move back in. The actual cause of the collapse, which points rather obviously to the many building sites that surround the houses, has not been addressed. The new building around the houses has paused. This is doing no favours to anyone at all which means we don't have enough information. What is actually happening? 

The only thing imaginable is that the building sites can be united across our houses and gardens if the houses fall or are sold off cheap, making a huge estate huger and higher in profits. 

No doubt the actual reason will become clear and no doubt it will be unimaginably impossibly daft.

04 10 2026

 Too much rattiness in studio to make any work possible - waiting to see if they have been poisoned off, after which I can clean and get back to angst.

Ideas flitter and faint.