ridiculous heat... and Im not posting any of the work Im doing, too shocking! Kitsch, tacky, jejune -nice I can shock myself.
vanilla beer work diary
In Amsterdam, by luck, I met Lino Hellings. She advised me to keep my work diary on-line, exposing my work methods rather than protecting them, risking the humiliation involved in failure. So:celebrate error. In my heart I knew this to be a good idea. My brain, horrified, fortunately tells me it will be too boring for anyone to read.
Wednesday, 24 June 2026
Saturday, 20 June 2026
21 06 2026
There's a little aircon unit in the studio so painting fairly easy, except it isn't. I seem to be channelling my inner Picabia, from his most uninspiring time.
There's an exhibition of his work at Ceres which I can get to, via three buses and several hours. Fairly daft thing to do in the current extreme heat so that idea on hold.
Back to the old roller-coaster of delight in getting something right and total despair when it aint. If it weren't so hot I'd give it up and try some housework.
Wednesday, 17 June 2026
17 06 2026
Back from Engerland... not a single exhibition did I get to, family stuff being pervasive. Nice, but no opportunity to get to Ai WeiWei in Manchester which I'd have liked, but no big deal. Nice to see the adorable tribe.
Now Bobs away and in theory I can get on with a painting or two. Managed to get the sold deer and steerer painting off to Marie-Pierre who will take it by train to Switzerland, then post it, bless her. Went to tidy the studio and found mouse droppings everywhere, god knows how they've got in. Have washed what can be washed, hope to feel more able tomorrow. Large numbers of drawings knocking about. A couple may be useful.
Sunday, 7 June 2026
08 06 2026
Looking for a photo of my sweet brother Steve and found this.... Steve died yesterday after a stint in intensive care. Im off to York to be with my remaining siblings.
Friday, 5 June 2026
06 06 2026
Been too busy to write work diary... chief culprit being maths book, the illustrations have had to be resized. This meant a. finding them and b. tracking the processes by which they were made in order to adjust them.
Honestly thought I was going mad.
In retrospect, understand that the process of making something is quite another space from real head stuff. (My painting methods are much the same, though physically easier to track I suppose.)
I work on three computers, the drawings were spread over them, in random files some inappropriatly named, on different platforms interupted by printed versions being dealt with by hand and/or sissors and returned to machine drawing. From this temporal distance it looks like chaos.
On hold now till the publishers send it back.
Managed to pack the little painting to go to Switzerland, a masterpiece in itself - Mike cut the cardboard box from Erica, Dominique helped the internal packaging, I gaffertaped it to point where I've no idea how it might be opened. Going via Marie Pierre to whom it must be delivered soon... the stuff of art, ha. A friend has just had his first exhibition (lifelong artist, too busy teaching or other work) and was amazed at the practicalities, transport, hanging, publicity and the rest. Paintings don't grow on walls, it seems, hoho.
Went life drawing last night - seem to have relinquished all control, waiting as ever for a new direction. Cant find the landscapes I did sometime, but ditto.
Life drawing slightly weird in that there were a lot of people there, almost all french - and my old mate Jean-Noel, whose brother I exhibited with in London long before moving here, and meeting the family :)
Lovely to see him, older but still kicking. The work that the French produce is sooooo slick!! Anigone eat your heart out. I scampered off before anyone could see what I was doing (they do that thing where they put their drawings on the platform and wait for people to say how good they are.)
Cybernetic stuff, Staffords Feschgrift, to sort and health stuff looming. Stuff, stuff.
Saturday, 23 May 2026
23 05 2026
Not being entirely idle. Drawing in the hills (dire), life drawing (awful, scared and rendered unhappy by model) (tattooed and v rude about the English, possibly not realising that they spoke French)(or more likely, did know)
Heard that the window I've been cleaning the study out for is unlikely to be installed due to illness of builder, who recommends replacing bookshelves and books, sigh.
Off to draw at the lake today. And life drawing tonight if back in time.


